Friday, October 30, 2009

Some of the Women Failures of marc1313

There are certainly many more, but these are the ones that I can think of at the top of my head. Never told anybody some of these stories.

(1) Was parking my car at school, and just completely asianed it up and epic failed. Took like 3 tries to park it correctly, at which point I realized that the chick parked next to me was waiting for me to park to get out of her car. I gather my things, apologize to her, and she says it's okay, and we just kind of share a long lingering look, which my dumbass overinterpreted. When I get back to my car later that night, her car is still there, so I grab a pen and a piece of paper, and write some retarded bullshit, cross that out, and write some even worse retarded bullshit (something like "hey it's the guy who couldn't park. you're hot. call me sometime".)

(2) Palm Springs for Paul's birthday last year. If you were there, well let's just leave it at that. If you weren't there, let's just say that this may have been insane crazy drunk Marc's finest day. We all go to this bar that has a high proportion of cougars, who are just looking for any reasonably attractive young guy to take back to their room, and have a good time with. Somehow managed to strike out with 4 different cougs that night, although I did at least dance with one (maybe two).

(3) It was the 4th of July, we were on Brian's block, and everybody was just going drunk crazy, in addition to the fireworks and other 4th celebration shit. I was like 438894098 beers, vodkas, and tequilas deep, and saw some chick that I knew from work, but couldn't remember her name. I remember she was kind of cute, she comes up to me, says hey Marc, how are you doing, and I reply "Who the fuck are you?!" and then fall face down into the bushes. Don't remember anything after that, but saw her the next day at work, and zOMG that was pretty awkward and embarrassing.

(4) This one goes back to middle school/beginning of high school, and there were these two chicks that were sooooo into me it was ridiculous, but one of my fuckhead buddies had some kind of problem with her, so like a good friend, I of course had a problem with her as well. Anyways, flash forward to a few years ago, and I see these same two chicks while I'm driving, and both are like model hot. We talk at a few red lights, but I somehow fail to get their numbers. Note to self: Super hot hoes before bros before hoes.

(5) REPOST: Go to the on campus pizza place that has big screen tv's before class to catch a few innings of the Dodger game. Meet the perfect on paper girl for me. We talk just about nothing but Dodger baseball for the better part of an hour, and watch the game on her MLB gametracker since it wasn't on tv, and when I get up to leave I say: "Listen you're awesome, and I had a great time talking with you. Would you like to go out sometime?" Obviously not good, and she basically said no, and yea let's stop talking about that one.

(6) Repost of a repost of a mother fucking repost (Cliffs Notes): Became good friends with the only woman that I have ever been in love with. Despite the fact that we had absolutely nothing in common, her smile, her laugh, everything about her, the way that I felt every day when I saw her, and the way she made me feel about myself, are things that I will never forget. Anyways, I never told her how I felt, I ran into her recently, she is now married with a child, and now I have the rest of my life to regret not telling her how I felt about her. If you have somebody special in your life, never miss a chance to tell them that you love them. So, to all the readers of my blog, you are all like family to me, and I love you all from the bottom of my heart.

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