Friday, September 23, 2011

Things That I Don't Understand

- Why women are so deathly afraid of spiders? It's a Fucking Spider! Chill the fuck out!
- Diet Soda, this Coke Zero shit, and all these fruity flavors they're coming out with. Listen...bottom line: if you want something healthy, drink fuckin' water! If you don't give two shits about your health like me, drink whatever the fuck you want.
- Why Ned Colletti signed Juan Uribe, traded James McDonald and Trayvon Robinson, and why Eugenio Velez is still on the roster
- Why "Party Girls" hasn't been officially recognized as the greatest song of all-time.
- How John Lackey is still starting every 5th day for the Boston Red Sox
- Why any man would wear briefs instead of boxers.
- Why Peyton Manning hasn't won MVP every single year the Colts have made the playoffs.
- Why women are so obsessed with salads. Everyone knows that fat chicks give the best head, so if you blow up, you are still cool ladies. Stop making me nervous with that salad shit.

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