The Best Thing About the Dodgers Epic Fail

is that I don't have to care and hang on every single game like it's the beginning/end of my life. I'll still watch as many as games as I can which won't be too many in the next few weeks, but still, it's kind of nice to be freed from the constant feeling of worry and panic.

The Moderator's Upcoming Itinerary

- Possible date...wish me Luck!
- If that goes bad....
- 2-3 strip club visits in the next month
- Insane crazy birthday celebrations where g/f or not I am 100% going to get laid, and dance the fucking night away
- Actual birthday composed of strip clubs + Chiefs Football!
- Cross Country Road Trip...can't fucking wait! Hoping to bang a different chick in every time zone, or preferably every state!

The Other Day

I went to a strip club for the first time in WAY too fucking long. Didn't spend a bunch, just wanted to get a couple few dances and see a good show.

My Notes
(1) The hawt ones never dance on the stage, they're too busy dancing back stage.
(2) Strip clubs are expensive as fuck even on "cheap days"
(3) I so fucking miss strip clubs...why did I ever stop frequenting you?

So I Might Actually Kind of Have a Date

tomorrow night...I'm not actually sure I don't want to jinx anything, I really shouldn't be posting anything here in case she reads the blog, but whatever. Wish me Luck! FYI it's probably not a date but it might be, will keep you all informed.

These Chinks

that keep spamming my blog are starting to piss me the fuck off. ENGLISH OR GTFO!

Time for You All to Have Some Fun

Alright so the Dodgers lost last night, so as promised I will do something redonkulous and entertaining. Just as a general starting point, if this were a bet with a Padres fan I'd have to wear a Padres' jersey all weekend, but that's not it. So send me ideas via text, fb, the comments section here, and I'll figure out something to do this weekend and post videos/pics on here.

If the Dodgers Lose Tonight...

I haven't figured it out yet but I'm going to do something redonkulous and entertaining. Just hope that they win, I'll get back to you in a few hours.

Fucked Up Recurring Dream

All right this happens at least a couple of times a week and is pretty fucked up. I've been having this recurring dream even before "Inception" so GFY Ryan!

So in the dream, I "wake up" and there is some sort of exterior force oppressing itself upon me like an earthquake, hurricane, or someone trying to murder me. I can't speak, move, or anything, I'm completely paralyzed, I think it goes back to my spleen accident.

I then "wake myself up" from the dream, get up walk around, and then go back to sleep only I'm still dreaming and am in a dream within a dream, and am back in the same predicament. This cycle or dream within dream continues like 4-5 times before I finally wake up for real and am drenched in sweat.

Something That All Women Do

that all women and some guys do that absolutely drives me nuts.

Woman: What do you think about this/What do you want to do?

The Moderator: Gives opinion

Woman (in a passive aggressive manner): really? i think (the opposite of what the moderator says).

FFS Womenz just tell me what to do/how to think, and stop with the song and dance.

New Phone

I think my text message rate is about to go through the fucking roof. And now that I can facebook from my phone, holy shit drunk nights are about to get a lot more interesting, but at least I'll have some clue or trail to help explain the previous nights events.

The Moderator Has A Confession to Make

I L-O-V-E LOVE the TV Show "Glee" and there is nothing teh ghey about it. Sometimes the storylines are kind of redonkulous, but the show has a lot of heart, Rachel is out of this world talented, Sue Sylvester is a barrel of laughs (<3 Jane Lynch she pwns every role she is in) and the music is just amazing.

Spoiler Alert

Top 5 Favorite Glee Moments (only seen half the episodes so forgive any omissions)

#5- "Dream On" and "Piano Man" with Neil Patrick Harris

#4- "Defying Gravity"

#3- Finn tells Rachel he loves her right before they go on stage at Regionals where their Journey mash just rocks.

#2- "Don't Stop Believing" in the Pilot episode. I was 50/50 as to whether I was going to watch another episode, but when they ended with this, I got hooked.

#1- Rachel absolutely killing it at Sectionals with her rendition of "Don't Rain on My Parade". She absolutely owned that audience, and the stage.

The Worst Thing About Asian Drivers

Is not that they are responsible for like 95% of accidents (with women and senior citizens making up the rest)

Is not that they always have that deer in the headlights look

Is not that they make lane changes without looking or signaling

Is not that parking lots are their kryptonite (anyone who's driven with me knows that this is true for me as well)

IT IS THAT THEY HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE THAT THEY ARE DOING SOMETHING WRONG. They are oblivious to their awful driving, and hence have no chance to ever improve. In their minds their driving is 100% a okay.

Current Playlist

- AGon's walkup song: "Get Up/Levantate"
- "Dark Blue"
- "Cyclone"
- "Don't Stop Believing" glee style
- "Defying Gravity"
- Trying so fucking hard to find this song I heard in the club and then on the radio the other night. All I know is that the lyric: "beautiful girls" is somewhere in the song, but that's not the title of the song. HELP!
- "Pretty In Pink" Social D style
- "Gamblin' Man"
- "Kokomo"
- "Surfin USA"
- "Canon in D Major"
- "Go Getta"
- "So Big"
- "Body Bounce"

Blackout Drunk Sex

If two people have sex while they are both blackout drunk, and there are no witnesses, and neither person remembers it in the morning, then did it really happen?

170 Miles or something Like That

- Trump National GC is the absolute illest! Can't wait to play there.

- Pretty much the most ridiculous day of driving ever. At one point I hit 5 consecutive yellow lights, none of which I could even consider going on. I almost just ran a red on the last one because I was so fed up with that bullshit.

- Redonkulous assholes in Newport fucking shit up, every restaurant we wanted to hit being closed or unaccessible, and no fucking parking like anywhere. The Worst the WORST was when some total assclown stops in the middle of the fucking parking lot just to hang out for like 5 minutes, and won't let anybody go around him.

- OC Fair was lovely as always. Had a great time, wish I had made the bball shot or found my fried butter but there's always next time!

Random Remembrances from the Other Night

First off, thanks to everyone who came out, I had an awesome time no doubt.

- Slamming my phone down into the street after those Nazis at the cougar bar wouldn't let me in. GG Phone

- Woman almost well kind of violating Man Law #1 like 25 times

- Solid dinner and I'm pretty sure I made a few pretty teh ghey remarks...whoops

- Inventing a new dance move: The Marc1313 spin. Thanks H's btw for being the first girls to like dance with me for an extended period of time ever. the M1313 spin requires two chicks and a slick pair of shoes preferably hush puppies, and pretty much you spin and taking turns dancing with them. It's pretty cool and works best when drunk.

- Drinking quite a few adios' and it was indeed adios for the moderator.

- Making ra tarded drunkbooking posts