Breaking My No Poker Rule

Because I hate talking about "serious stuff" and you all have your own problems, but I just have to vent, because there's just nothing sicker than final table bubbling (10th place) a tournament. Entered the final 2 tables with the chip lead, made a crazy river call with 3rd pair on a bet that was either the nuts or a stone cold bluff. I went with my instincts that said stone cold bluff because I ALWAYS trust my instincts (and they're usually right...can't tell you how many crazy river calls I've correctly made with bottom pair, ace high, or even worse), but this time I was wrong. Still was 2nd in chips, but went insanely card dead, picked up some small pots here and there, until my QQ lost to AJ all in pre-flop for 2nd place in chips. He spiked 2 aces of course, and I was out in 10th. Still not a bad payday, but God I wanted a fucking win so badly. Still deep in another tourney with a ton of chips, so hopefully I take it down.