Thursday, November 19, 2009

Bread and Butter

Yeah I know what you're all thinking, what the fuck is going on here? For the past two weeks, this blog has flat out fucking sucked, lets not lie or beat around the bush, because it's true. I've tried to get all "dramatic" but let's face it it is not my fortay, and while the murder mystery will be completed this week, let's face it, the reason you all come here is to laugh, and laugh you will. So let's just start here, with random things that I hate:

- when there's one piece of pizza left (or fill in the blank for other food). Do you take the last piece and be "that guy", or do you stay hungry and let somebody else be "that guy"

- when I have to stop staring at the hot chick in the car next to me/walking, because I am driving...lets just say I've had my fair share of near accidents while checking out the local scenery

- Being too hot AND too cold. LOL Everybody Loves Raymond FTW!

- Getting blackout drunk, not remembering WTF happened the night before, and not knowing if your friends are fucking with you when they tell you all the ra tarded shit that you did the night before

- Being "that guy" that hyped up and picked a movie that ultimately was no bueno. Yea that's why I need to just trust rotten tomatoes, and not judge movies by their trailers.

- The NBA. Ha LOL Basketball.

- Seeing an item that I really want marked "on sale" at the grocery store, only to see that the item is sold out.

- Seeing a chick who looks really hot from behind or the side, but turns out to be a 4 or below when you see her face. It's like opening that Christmas present expecting a BB gun, and ending up with a sweater (yea i know the boxes would be wrapped differently fuckheads, but it's goddamn 3:00 am in the morning, I'm tired, I'm ranting and raving, and can't think straight. Yea alright I'll stop with the similes if you stop with the fucking inquisitions alright! FUCK!


- Taking that last piece of pizza and not feeling bad about it
- The Pouring Rain
- Driving with the windows down, regardless of weather conditions
- Hot chicks with a nice rack
- Getting blackout drunk, not remembering shit, yet waking up with no hangover. One Advil right before going to bed FTW! Then having your friends tell you all the awesome shit that you did the night before.
- Saying French words. I don't know why, but they're just cool to say.
- The suicide squeeze, straight steals of home, blitzing all night, and fullback screens.

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