Thursday, November 19, 2009

12 Years Ago Today (Long and Self-Centered, but I'm Having a Shitty Night so STFU!)

Was my third open-heart surgery at Loma Linda Hospital. Here are things that I remember about that experience:

- The day before the procedure, after doing all the tests that I had to do, my parents took me to Scandia, which is AWESOME! Played some mini golf, arcade games, and rode the roller coaster, and then had dinner at TGI Friday's which was even more awesome.

- Spent the night at the Ronald McDonald house across the street from the hospital, and the Lakers had a game against the Jazz that night, but I can't remember who won.

- Slept like a baby, as it was the last night of my life, during which my voice was normal. For those of you who don't know, the reason my voice is all fucked up, is because during this surgery, my breathing tube ruptured my vocal cords. My voice used to be a lot worse, but speech therapy and time have made it better.

- VERY IMPORTANT: The last thing I remember before the anesthesia kicked in, was the D'Backs and Ray's expansion draft going on that morning. I remember being so concerned about which players the Dodgers were going to protect (even moreso than my operation) not realizing that both expansion teams would reach the World Series, and in the D'Backs' case win it all before the Dodgers did. Aww the joys of bleeding Dodger blue.

- Surgery went great, but dear God did I give the nurses hell that night when they wouldn't let me eat/drink anything but ice chips. I was walking around the same day as the surgery, ohh let me tell you about the surgery itself, since you probably don't know, it was just a simple valve transplant. One of my valves well to put it in marc1313 terms: "fucking sucks" so the pig valve that I had was replaced with a valve made of gortex (a kind of cloth) that has worked for me ever since.

- Two days later I got to go home, but not before they pulled my drainage tube, which for you guys out there, feels literally like someone is grabbing your nuts, and removing them from your body.

- The next day was the Michigan-Ohio State game where Charles Woodson went crazy and won himself a Heisman. Will never forget watching that game on my couch, sipping on some Top Ramen. Can't wait for this Saturday, as regardless of the records, there are few things in the sports world, that are better than waking up at 9am on the 3rd Saturday of November, turning on ABC, and watching "Hail to the Victors" meets "Script Ohio". Best rivalry in college football, and rivalry Saturday is one of the best days in the sports year.

- Had a week at home off of school, and did absolutely nothing but play N64 games until my eyes bled.

- Went back to school WAY too soon, but I tried being "a tough guy", was in major pain the whole time, every single day, got the whole pity treatment from the girls (which I guess is better than the OMG please go away treatment that I get now) and every guy in school began to master the art of imitating my voice. Most of them were pathetically awful, but one guy Dennis, forget his last name, but he was the only kid in school smaller than me, mastered my voice imitation, and for that I gave him his props.

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