Thursday, September 1, 2011

Grocery Store Pet Peeves

All posted pet peeves assume that the store is at least mildly crowded and there is at least one person waiting in line:

- People who buy food with food stamps, but have a shit ton of cash in their wallets, and are wearing nice designer clothes.

- The fact that there are always twenty million little kids there. I think that's why they always play soothing/relaxing music there (although repetitions of said songs can drive you insane- i know there are tons of fellow ex-grocery store workers reading, and you know what I mean). I love baseball, but everytime I hear a commerical for the Fullerton Flyers I want to punch a hole in my face.

- When that asshole won't fucking move one inch to let you get through.

- The Unprepared: The time to pull out your cash/credit card/checkbook is when you are waiting in line or the checker rings you up, NOT when they ask you to pay. Jesus Christ I have lost 6+ months of porn/strip club time out of my life while these fucktards fumble around for their shit because they are fucking mentally retarded and have never been to a grocery store before.

- The people who divide their order into three different orders (I see this more than you think). I understand two, but 3+ when there is a line is just fucking inconsiderate as fuck.

- When no courtesy clerk is available, there is a long line, and there are at least two people in the ordering party, and both refuse to bag their own groceries, just standing around with their thumb up their ass making the checker do it, and holding up the line for everyone else. HOW FUCKING LAZY/RETARDED/INCONSIDERATE can you be you FUCKTARDS???!!!! FUCK YOU X 10000000000000!!!!

- And the fucking worst of the fucking worst: That cheap fucking piece of shit who argues and argues with the clerk and is a doucehbag/cunt about it over a price check under $1. I understand if there is a difference of a few bucks, but arguing over 20 cents is just fucking retarded. I have actually offered to pay the difference on a few occasions just to get these fucks out of my way. This asshole/cunt is usually someone to whom the money means nothing, they just like being argumentative fucks, hold up the line, and be miserable to the clerks because they themselves are miserable.

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