Tuesday, November 3, 2009

An Argument Against Going to the Mall

- You do realize that your woman will NEVER let you leave! This place is their Dodger Stadium, favorite tailgating spot, and favorite strip club all rolled into one.

- If you take your woman with you, lets just say you're wallet WILL BE significantly lighter when you get home. Credit Card debt FTL!

- Little kids everywhere, especially when it's near Christmas or Easter time, and Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny are at the mall, then the place is just going to be swarmed with rugrats. Good luck trying to be able to breathe.

- All those jewelry, and other high-end retail stores are going to put all sorts of crazy ideas into your woman's head. Hey if you're fine with that, then go ahead, good luck, but don't cry to me when we're 40 and your Sundays consist of Sunday brunch followed by ballet recital followed by clothes shopping, and NO Football and NO Sex. I will have no sympathy for you, and will be enjoying my Sundays drinking beer and watching football at a strip club just laughing my ass off at your plight.

- If you are anything like me, you are GOING to get lost. I can find my way to just about any city in the LA/OC area without using a map, but if you put me into a mall my sense of direction gets Brian Parrelli esque.

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