Saturday, January 9, 2010

Ways to Know You Have a Keeper

- She ADDS to your porn collection

- You forget her birthday, Valentines Day, or your anniversary and she doesn't throw a shit fit, and remind you of how big a fucktard you are every day for the next month. Don't believe that such a woman exists, but if she does, then you have a keeper.

- She knows more about sports than your guy friends.

- She EVER for any reason whatsoever, and no matter how unsubtly suggests or recommends that you have a threesome with another chick. At this point, you are required under penalty of castration to immediately sell all your worldly possessions, and empty any and all checking + savings accounts, to buy her the most expensive engagement ring that you can, because she deserves it.

- She not only lets you check out and comment on how hot other chicks are, but is checking out/commenting along with you.

- She forgets your birthday, Valentines Day, your anniversary, etc. because she was too preoccupied with anything sports related.

- Her sexual appetite is greater than yours, although if this is true, it is quite possible that you are teh ghey.

- You approach her one day and say: "Bitch me and the guys are having a guys only weekend this weekend. Here's $100 go have yourself a fucking ball" and her reply is "Do you think team X will cover the spread?"

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